We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize