The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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