Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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