if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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