But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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