Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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