if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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