Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
