Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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