Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Ladies don't puke and tell
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
