I want to stick my p in your. b.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
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I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize