How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
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Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
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My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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