So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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