Your face is a jimmy john
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize