dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
