New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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