Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
