Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
