woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
