Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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