we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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