Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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