did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
