So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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