Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I cannot find my penis.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
