there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
