my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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