She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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