He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
