Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I understand Curling. That high.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I will be naked everywhere
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
