he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
