That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Randomize
