batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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