Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
