If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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