I'm gonna have a badass scar
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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