I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
