NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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