Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
they're like a gay fantastic four
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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