ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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