'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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