idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
