Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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