I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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