I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
