lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
