margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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