There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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