I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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