i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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